Currently, most American high school seniors have submitted their college applications and are waiting for letters of acceptance (or rejection). Hard to believe that was me just over six years ago!
I attended a well-ranked college and finished my degree in 2017, graduating Phi Beta Kappa, magna cum laude, and one term early. No, I’m not some kind of Einstein—my high school was laser-focused on college prep and I worked hard at college. Most people would probably say that I succeeded.
However, I have no intention of ever using my Bachelor’s degree. It’s nothing more than a pretty wall decoration for our office. So take it from someone who spent the time, money, and energy on school. College isn’t worth it for everyone.
Background
I have a fairly normal secondary school background for an overachiever, so I won’t go into too much detail here.
Teenage girl—me—is a straight-A student who spends her days in class, studying, practicing the piano, tutoring, and participating in various clubs and activities.
Girl has learned from her teachers and peers that building an excellent resume for college is “just what smart, hardworking kids do.”
Girl tries to be good at everything while simultaneously dealing with her parents’ divorce and extreme anxiety. She does not enjoy school, but she grits her teeth and pushes through.
She has no idea what she wants to do in the future. But she imagines college as the Promised Land where she’ll finally fit in, make friends, and most importantly discover what she’s passionate about.
What College Was Actually Like
I did get into my dream school. And at the beginning, I made friends, partied, got in trouble, and aced my classes—just like I’d imagined.
But my dreamy college experience was quickly derailed by a few major events my freshman year. First, I met my now-husband. Then, I lost a friend in a horrific car accident. Finally, I started to get sick—really sick. (I had Lyme’s disease and several food intolerances that turned into IBS, but they weren’t diagnosed for a few months.)
Losing my friend was a wakeup call for me. Life is fleeting and unpredictable. Did I really want to spend mine slaving away for some hypothetical passion and career I hadn’t discovered yet? I wasn’t ready to say no yet, but I began thinking more critically about my life choices.
Between falling in love, the accident, and my poor health, school started to feel like a nuisance and a burden. Instead of thriving, I was just trying to get the work done. My professors’ desire for passion and perfection began to irritate me. I had no passion anymore and no time for perfection.
Then the burnout started. Luckily, I’d settled on an easy-for-me degree. But at this point, I actively disliked all class and studying. Is college worth it for me? By this point my answer was definitely no.
I discovered blogging and with it, a few hobbies I actually did love. Constantly, I wished for more time—to write, practice photography, and learn design. Eric and I talked seriously about a future together, and I wanted to be a wife and a mom. Now, school was just something that got in the way of living.
The End
Finally, I graduated. And though I graduated early and with honors, graduation was bittersweet.
We were supposed to be celebrating all the doors now open to us, as a result of our accomplishments—but I knew that my future wasn’t behind any of those doors.
We were supposed to be remembering all of the wild, crazy times we’d had with our friends. I have some good memories, but after the accident, I quickly outgrew the party scene.
At least I now had some sense of what I wanted for my future. But what could have been? If not for all the pressure of high school and the time-consuming busywork in college, could I have discovered my passions much earlier? If I’d had the time and energy to think about my future starting as a teenager, could I have discovered my passion, forged my own path, and avoided those pointless four years of study?
I don’t think that 16, 18, or 21 is too young to know what you want to do in life, and to choose for yourself whether college is worth it for you. Although I’d never take back my experience—especially meeting my husband and friends—college wasn’t worth it for me, in the end.
Is College Worth It? What I’ll Teach My Kids
More than anything, I want to give my kids space, mental space and time to grow outside of academics during their secondary education.
If they want to attend college and get a degree to become a vet, lawyer, accountant, etc? That’s great. If they want to take time to decide if college is right for them and work as a barista for a couple of years? That’s great too. If they want to start their own business and skip college entirely? Okay! College might not be worth it for them, and that’s okay.
There are many ways to be happy in this world, and they do not all involve four-year college degrees, graduate school, corporate jobs, traveling the world, moving to a big city, getting married in your 20s, not getting married in your 20s, or any other arbitrary measure of success for a young person.
I’ll tell my kids to be flexible when it comes to their future plans, and most of all be yourself and choose what makes you happy—even if it’s different than most people. After college, my choices in work and life were anything but normal. But for the first time, I feel like I’m truly living my own life and working towards my own goals.
So is college worth it? For many people, yes. But for some people, no, and I don’t believe that we (in the US at least) encourage young people to think critically enough about that choice. We assume that all high-achieving students, in particular, should go on to get a four-year degree and possibly more–and that’s a huge waste of talent and energy.
Next week I’ll be back with seven reasons why college might not be for you. But in the meantime, what are your thoughts on higher education in your country? What were your high school and possibly college experiences like?