I took a glorious eight-week break from social media in December and January. When I finally logged back onto Facebook and Instagram, I realized that I had some digital “decluttering” to do in order to have a sustainable relationship with social media going forward.
First, there were the 20-something Facebook groups that I was a part of. Some of them were blogging-related and mostly ads/engagement threads that I never participated in, so I left them. Then there were the local groups I was a part of. Besides the [city name] mom groups, none of them were really relevant to me, so I left those, too.
Then there was the last category—the “crunchy mom” groups. I’m a crunchy person, but in the past few years, I feel like there’s a strong tie between being crunchy and being ultra-conservative that isn’t true for me. So a lot of the activity in these groups was fear-based: fear of losing medical freedom, fear of public school teachings, fear of different foods, etc. It is not good for mental health to read sad, scary content all the time. So I left most of those, too. There were just more cons than pros at that point.
With Instagram it was the same. I unfollowed a bunch of crunchy influencers, a few businesses (I asked myself—why would I choose to have MORE advertising in my Instagram feed?!), and a few old friends/peers I wasn’t in contact with anymore.
My FB/IG breaks allowed me to notice some things about my social media usage that weren’t sustainable, including:
- Following accounts, pages or groups that negatively affect mental health. I send my kids to public school, vaccinate them and don’t follow a super strict diet—so seeing people freak out about these things constantly made me feel apprehensive about my otherwise-confident choices.
- Following accounts or pages that only advertise and offer no useful content. We’re exposed to enough ads daily; no need for more! My budget thanked me for my social media break, for sure.
- Scrolling “suggested content” on both sites. I really dislike recommended content that shares bad news, people’s experiences with cancer/rare childhood genetic disorders/drug addictions/etc, more crunchy/ultra-conservative fearmongering, or on the other hand, parenting content that’s supposed to be funny but mostly exploits or bullies kids. None of that is good for anxiety or general mental health. It’s important to be informed, but beyond the top headlines, most of it is unnecessary to know. “We must cultivate our own gardens,” as Voltaire wrote wisely. Like most people, I want to help and support others who are suffering—but that energy is better directed towards charities and people in my own life, rather than strangers for whom I can do so little.
- Forgoing books in favor of my phone. I’ve re-read so many favorite books and some new ones already this year—mostly personal development—and my mental health has vastly improved reading uplifting words.
- Taking my phone everywhere with me. Leaving my phone at home gives me an incredible feeling of freedom! How glorious is it to visit the park or a family member’s house without that little device tethered to your hand? At first I felt a bit naked without it, but now I love it and look for opportunities to leave it behind.
My digital life feels streamlined and sustainable now, which is a good way to start the year. Like physical decluttering, we need to re-evaluate every so often to make sure that our habits are aligned with current goals. Goals evolve over time, and there is no need to be ashamed of that.
Speaking of which, I am getting excited to update my wardrobe and personal style this year. My style is evolving as I approach 30 and I’m going to get a few inches cut off my hair next week (it’s far too long and unruly at the moment)!
xx Claire