One of my blogger friends used to have a post series called “What’s On My Mind” that I loved. Sometimes you just want to hear somebody’s unfiltered, unedited, not-SEO-optimized thoughts about something.
So, I’m using the idea here. Sometimes I want to chat about a specific topic, and that chat is too long to put in a 2-3 sentence snippet in my Life Lately posts. Today’s topic is blogging as a parent–or more accurately, blogging as a parent when you don’t want to write about your kids.
My Worries About Blogging With Kids
You can read more about why I don’t like sharing my kids (or too much about myself) under my “private life” tag. This is true across all my social media outlets. I occasionally post a picture for kids’ birthdays or when they try a new activity, like when my oldest took ski lessons this winter. But overall I’m protective of their privacy and if they ever ask me to delete anything when they’re old enough to have social media profiles, I’ll do it in a heartbeat.
As my kids have gotten older, I worry not just about predators online or how they feel about me sharing, but also about bullying. K-12 kids can be mean, having experienced bullying in middle school myself. Sometimes I wonder if I should stop blogging altogether for that reason, even though I barely talk about them on JtC.
As I’ve gotten more involved in our community, I also find myself hesitant to share details for privacy reasons (like what school my kids attend or events we go to). Also, I don’t post photos or information about friends, ever. Or extended family. It feels like I censor more and more of my personal life as time goes on, so much so that I have very little to share sometimes.
When your full-time (and then some–my husband’s coworkers doesn’t wake him up crying at 4am, lol) job is caring for your kids, that crowds out other activities like freelancing, creative pursuits or self-development. Those are the things I’d write about, ideally. But often I go a few weeks at a time without having a free moment to devote to them.
Openness vs. Oversharing
We live in the Midwest and something people who don’t live here, don’t understand how private people are, myself included. People are extremely friendly and polite–too non-confrontational sometimes, haha–but it’s hard to make new friends or be vulnerable without feeling like you’ve overshared. I would say the boundaries for what constitutes honesty/vulnerability versus oversharing are stricter than elsewhere.
When I act like a Midwesterner in my everyday life, and then I come online and chat more openly, am I inauthentic? Is telling you what I’m reading, cooking, or looking forward to overstepping my own privacy? Social media in recent years has blurred those boundaries too. Is it cringe-y to keep blogging? Am I dating myself? Will I regret it at 40, 50 or 60?
I love to write, and while I know there’s not much money in blogging anymore, I do feel like it helps keep me “in writing shape” for the future, when I would like to freelance for pay.
What Does The Future Hold?
To be honest, I’m not sure. I have a good thing here; I have years of content that I am constantly polishing, that ranks well in searches, and I have a good base level of readership that makes writing feel worthwhile. I don’t want to up and delete it. I’ve put too much work in!
At the same time, I feel like my era of personal blogging is coming to a close. It’s just becoming too difficult to untangle my own life from the lives of my kids, friends and family. I don’t live in a vacuum anymore, you know? Family bloggers/vloggers/influencers are a dime a dozen these days. I don’t want to be remembered as the woman who sold out her kids’ childhoods for the chance at a dollar.
As my kids get older, into elementary school and beyond, I’ll have more time to devote to the topics I want to blog about. One will hit that stage next year! (Babies truly do not keep.) Until then, I’ll pop on whenever I have something homemaking/self-development/recipe-related to share. I want to apply myself more to freelancing and building my portfolio, so that will take up time as well.
No dramatic goodbyes, just changing course. If you’re a blogger, please feel free to share your site in the comments (you can comment as a guest–just start typing your name into “or sign up with Disqus” and check the box that says “I’d rather post as a guest.”
All my best, and I’ll see you here again soon!
xx Claire